Jurassic Park III II

Jurassic Park III was a colossal pile of shit. I'm sure most of us could agree with that statement. So... I'm remaking it. Right now. At this very moment. From what was something so awful that Spielberg refused to direct it, I shall try my damnest to make it at least somewhat watchable. Enjoy Jurassic Park III II: The Remaking.



Alternative titles included Jurassic Park III: The Cash In, Jurassic Park III: Whoops, Jurassic Park III: Thanks for your Money, Sucka!, and Jurassic Park III: When Spielberg doesn't direct this one and he directed the Lost World, you should've known.



"Hey, is this rope safe, bra? I mean, it doesn't feel very sturdy."



"Hey, senor, I checked it last month. What the hell could have happened to it from one month? Whiny gringo... You gringos ready to take off or what?"



"Let's do it to it, bra! You sure you'll be safe here, bra?"



"Hey, I'll be fine, gringo! It's not like dinosaurs can swim or anything! Enjoy your flight, gringos!"



"Whee! It's like I'm flying! Hey, what happened to those Latino guys?
It appears that a well placed fog is blocking our view of the ship. Hm... Hope nothing ate them."





"Oh, snap, bra."